officer dumb and officer friendly

So The Wife had her wallet stolen earlier this week. There have been all kind of headaches to deal with since then, from canceling credit cards, to getting a new driver's licence. When she was at the MVC¹ getting her new driver's licence, they told her that she needed to go to a police station to report her old one stolen. We were passing the police station across the street from Bullet-Proof KFC² the other night and decided to stop so she could report her stolen licence. This is how the conversation went...

Cop: What do you want?
Wife: I'm here to report a stolen ID.
Cop: How do you know it was stolen?
Wife: Trust me, it was stolen.
Cop: How do you know that?
Wife: Because it was with my credit card, which somebody used to make a fraudulent charge.
Cop: How could they do that without the PIN number?
Wife: Because it's a credit card. You don't need the PIN.
Cop: But you need the number to use it.
Wife: No, you just swipe it.
Cop: You just swipe it???
Wife: Yeah... it's a credit card.
Cop: And all you have to do is swipe it?
Wife: Yeah... it's a credit card.

As if that weren't annoying enough, sometime after midnight that same night someone buzzed our condo. When I asked who it was, the guy said, "It's the police. Can you come out here and answer a few questions?" We were both worried, and I gave serious consideration to carrying my anti-zombie shovel³ down with me just in case this was a trick. When I asked what it was all about he said, "You were at the police station earlier this evening, right? We have a few more questions to ask you for the report." When The Wife and I got down to the door, there were two cops who asked us a few more questions. One of the cops was named Officer Friendly. He was pudgy, jovial, and had a boyish side-smile... very true to his name.

Only in New Jersey...

1) Motor Vehicle Commission
2) Our local Kentucky Fried Chicken has thick bullet-proof glass at the drive-thru. They have a little compartment where you put your money to get it into the restaurant, and they put your change and food in the other side to get it back to you.
3) Which is also good at digging your car out of the snow when you've been plowed in.